Welcome to Cliche Thursday, where we occasionally deconstruct 5 expressions that we’ve all become a little too familiar with.
Today we’re skewering cliches that have been suggested by readers.
Here we go…
“I’ll be there in two shakes of a lamb’s tail” – (idea from reader Michael P) I’ll be honest, having very limited exposure to the hind quarters of a sheep, I’m not sure what to make of this.
I imagine a sheep’s tail shakes very fast by itself, which if that’s true means you’ll be here in about 1.5 seconds. Fantastic! Thanks for being so prompt.
UNLESS…a sheep’s tail does not move by itself at all. Maybe it just hangs there and you have to physically shake it with your hand. If that’s the case I’m guessing you’re not going to be here for a while. Sure, you might be able to sneak up on a sheep and get that first shake right away. But once he’s wise to your game? That second shake could take hours.
“You’re just grasping at straws” – (idea from reader Katie M) Have you ever grasped for straws? It’s really not as hard as they make it out to be.
Straws typically come in 100-count boxes, and all you do is reach in and grab one. Does it get tricky if your kid wants a blue one and you keep grasping pink and green? Sure. But with a little persistence and functioning opposable thumbs it really isn’t that preposterous of a notion.
I feel like the people who turned this into a cliche were really grasping at straws.
“It’s time to face the music” – (idea from reader Jamie the VWM.) Is it really though? Because the cool thing about sound is your ear can pick up the mechanical sound waves no matter which way your facing.
I hope it’s okay, but I’m gonna continue to face AWAY from the music. And while we’re on the subject, you might want to talk to the band about wearing pants for their next gig.
“You made your bed now you have to lie in it” – (idea from reader Steph L.) I’ve always been baffled by this one. When it’s time for me to sleep I could care less what condition the bed is in. Granted, if the bed was made then it’s going to take a little extra effort to get the covers pulled back so I can get comfortable, but is it so much of an issue that we need to build an expression around it?
But hey, I could be wrong. If you’re the type of person who goes to get in bed, realizes that you made your bed earlier in the day, and is suddenly so discouraged that you decide to sleep on the couch, let me know so we can collectively make fun of you.
“That’s not my cup of tea” – (idea from reader Mark W.) I know it’s not your cup of tea. It’s not anyone’s cup of tea because it’s not a cup and it has nothing to do with brewed tea leaves.
It’s an activity that I do with random strangers I meet online and so I’ll ask you again, “Do you want to come coed naked outdoor figure skating with me this afternoon or not?”
What About You? If an expression is really chapping your lips lately, flame it in the comments.
(for past editions of Cliche Thursday, click here.)