It’s the first day of the month, which means you’ve probably heard some variation of the phrase “Can you believe it’s already ______!!!” roughly 42 times.
Since we’ve all heard this expression a million times before, we usually answer with the same lame responses:
+ “I know, crazy, huh?”
+ “This year is TOTALLY flying by!”
+ “Yeah, seems like [holiday that was 3 months ago] was just a few weeks ago!”
I say, forget the canned response. Someone needs to take a stand against overused cliches, so why not us? We are better than this, people!
The next time someone attacks you with this expression, try one of these.
The 10 Best Responses to “Can you believe it’s already ____?”
You’ll be tempted to say more, but just let that “yes” dangle out there like a boog hanging in your boss’s nose hair. And don’t walk away from the awkwardness…just stand there. In those uncomfortable moments you’ll learn a lot about whomever it is you’re talking to.
2. “No, you know it seems like just yesterday I was heavy petting with my wife under the mistletoe.”
(replace “under the mistletoe” with “on valentine’s day” or “under the fireworks” depending on the time of year). This response not only gives positive feedback to Neil, but it also lets him know that you love your wife and you enjoy being intimate with her. You affirm Neil AND the institution of marriage in one statement. Good for you!
3. “IT IS? HOLY FOX FECES!!!! WHERE DID THE YEAR GO??!!!”
For effect you can either sprint away from the conversation like your jorts are on fire or punch Neil in the kidney as you scream like a hyena. It’s a win either way.
4. “Yes I can. But what I can’t believe is that you’re so uncomfortable around me, you need to resort to cliched conversation starters, you child.”
Works well when you’re trying to ensure said person hates you and never speaks to you again.
5. “I just read a blog post about that at BryanAllain.com.
Shameless, I know.
6. “Who cares?”
because really, when you get down to it, who does care?
7. “No I don’t believe it, and thanks for asking. I’m pretty sure EVERYONE – from the USA Today to my Page-A-Day Calendar – is messing with my head. As far as I’m concerned, none of us have any idea what day it is.”
A favorite among conspiracy theorists.
8. “Really?!? Why can’t we have 32 days in a month just once! It’s NOT FAIR!”
Deliver this one like a 13-year old girl who’s not allowed to go to the sleepover because of her grades. Bonus points for stomping and slamming any door in the vicinity.
9. “Not to offend you, but I don’t believe in the Gregorian Calendar, and according to the Julian Calendar it’s actually still the 23rd.”
If this is something you’ve actually said before, there’s a 96% chance that you were on your high school’s quiz bowl team or you’ve seen every episode of Star Trek: The Next Generation.
10. “I know, right? Feels like just yesterday that I made parole!”
Give this one about 3 seconds while their brain processes this new info. Then snarl, crack your neck, and walk away with a slight limp and your hands raised in the air. You just earned some respect.
Got a good response to “I can’t believe it’s already _________?”