Sometimes Tyler Stanton and I get angry at people. Instead of yelling at them, we hold it in and write them letters we’ll never actually deliver because we’re punks.
These are those letters.
Dear People who comment on Youtube videos,
I just don’t get it.
Angrily Yours, Tyler and Bryan
PS – “You are so dumb, you are really dumb, for real.” – A Dodson
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Dear Credit Card Companies,
Congratulations on making gobs of money off of undisciplined spenders, but why are you spending half of your fortune sending me junk mail?
I’d rather open a letter marked “Fresh Anthrax Inside” with open cuts on my hand than tear into one of your crummy offers.
For the love of Mr. McFeely, save the trees or something.
Angrily yours, Tyler & Bryan
PS – Those fake plastic cards you send are brilliant. Every time I see one I want to sign up for a credit card. Not.
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Dear Hotels,
I don’t need you to come make the bed every 4 hours.
And I certainly don’t need you to tuck the sheets in so tight that I need a crowbar and a hot work permit to pry them loose.
Here’s a new rule: unless I’m staying for more than a week, leave me a stack of towels and stay out of my room.
Angrily yours, Tyler & Bryan
PS – doing origami with the loose end of the toilet paper roll does nothing for me.
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How about you?
Y’all had some gems last time we did this. Got any more angry letter you need to write?