Yesterday I gave you 5 games I hated as a kid. If you haven’t lost all respect for me yet, keep reading.
10 Games I Hated as a Kid, Pt. 2
6. Musical Chairs – Such suspense and intrigue. I’m surprised no one has ever died from a coronary from this thing. I hated this game because it’s like a horror movie without the killing and blood. Well, depending on how violent the game got, I guess blood could be involved.
6a. Wonderball – (I’ve been informed by Erica that no one she knows every played this game…maybe it’s a Massachusetts thing?) Basically it was like musical chairs except you passed a ball around while singing a song. When the song was done, whoever had the ball was out.
“The Wonderball goes round and round, to pass it quickly, you are bound…actually you are not bound, because there’s always that kid who takes his time with it just to be a clown…If you’re the one, to hold it last…actually it’s not the one to hold it last, it’s the person to the left of the jerk who swats it away without even holding it as the stupid song ends…the game is past and you are OUT.”
7. Chicken Fights – I was that kid at the pool who didn’t know how to dive and couldn’t jump in without blocking his nose (see: Nostrils, Big), so any game that involved water made me want to get out of the pool and sit on a chaise lounge of solitude.
Chicken fights were especially awful because it was combining two things I hated: water AND fighting. And I hate the name too, because the whole thing had nothing to do with poultry. Was I a chicken for losing a chicken fight or a chicken for not playing at all? Let’s call it what it really is “Slap Fighting on People’s Shoulders”
8. Marco Polo – Another game that needs to be properly named. I propose “Let people maliciously splash water in your face while you walk around with your eyes mostly closed”.
As you might have guessed, I was not a fan of pool parties.
9. Punch for Punch – The only folks who enjoyed this game were people who got pleasure out of hitting other people. I think I hated punching someone else more than I hated being punched. Either way, it was a lose-lose.
10. Capture the Flag – I was going to file this one under hide and seek, but I guess it’s a separate game. The whole idea of hiding and running in the woods while enemies try to defeat you sounds a lot like war to me. And as far as as I know, nobody likes war.
(and don’t get me started on paintball, which is basically Capture the Flag + Intense Pain.)
Games that didn’t make the list:
Red Rover – For some reason, always liked this one. Go figure.
7-Up – I always assumed that every girl who tapped my head liked me.
Simon Says – I was usually good at this one. The losers were the suckers who couldn’t concentrate.
Do you have ANY respect left for me?