Deconstructing Spam

Got this email the other day and I had to laugh.

I love when someone tries to make spam sound like not-spam.

Here’s 10 ways this guy failed.

1 – FAIL. I do not have a triberocket website. I own the domain name, but there ain’t no site. You’re off to a great start.

2 – What type of research do you have to do to find a website that doesn’t exist? I’m guessing it involves a farmer’s almanac and a divining rod.

3 – Another lie. You did not “decide to look me up” based on my website. Because again, I have no website.

4 – So intriguing because really, you just can’t find free information these days.

5 – What industry, exactly? The industry of lying about websites that don’t exist?

6 – Telling me that your own website comes up as the first result in a Google search for your name is a waste of time. Kind of like this whole email.

7 – “Knowledge exchange?” What is this, the Matrix? When you put it that way it sound so warm, personal, and inviting, how can I refuse?

8 – Problem solving too? Where were you in 1998 when I was trying to pass Heat Transfer for the third time?

9 – Thanks for clearing that up.

10 – I enjoyed deleting your email, that’s about it.

Got a good spam email story?

What are your least favorite spams? Male enhancement, prescription pills, foreign dignitaries asking for money, or something even more ridiculous?