Amish Paradise

More Living With the Amish

6 Comments 29 May 2009

As always, these are actual photos take from my actual phone of actual Amish people.

Random amish dude rollerblading down the street.

No punchline here, I think the serenity of the picture speaks for itself.

Not sure why there’s 10 Amish boys sitting so close to the road, but I’ve got 3 guesses…

1. They’re trying to get as far away from the girls as possible.

2. They’re trying to escape the Amish church.

3. They’re hiding a Nintendo DS.

Some Sundays are worse than others for buggy traffic.

On this particluar Sunday, the buggies were definitely “out”.

Double-yellow “no passing” lines, I fart in your general direction.

3 Amish children transporting a marijuana bush.

What do you do if the lawn is a little too thick for an amish push mower?

You’ve got 2 options:

1. Get your little brother to pull the mower while you push.

Or…

2. You break out the Amish riding mower.

Who needs a John Deere when you’ve got an Ed Horse?

Miscellaneous

Hide and Seek with Donald Miller

4 Comments 28 May 2009

So you know how Derek Webb has been hiding pieces of his new music all over the country for fans to find? (just say ‘yes’ so we can move on)

Well, a few minutes ago on his Twitter, author Donald Miller made a similar announcement regarding his new book that releases in October, A Million Miles in a Thousand Years.

We are working on a plan to hide several “kinko’s” print outs of a million miles in a thousand years, autographed, all over the country.

twitter followers will be notified as to where they are. more later.

Think Derek’s latest adventure has influenced Don to have some fun as well? Well this picture, taken of the two of them celebrating Derek’s 35th birthday this week, is all the proof I need.

What do you think? Not necessarily ‘controversial’ like Derek’s deal…but pretty cool nonetheless. I’d love to get my hands on a kinko’s copy of Million Miles. Especially if it was well before the release date.

Oh, and this seems like as good a time as any to remind you that I am still the world record holder for the “Person who is Photographed with Don and Derek Looking More Unamused than They’ve Ever Been”

Like Dimaggio’s 56, it’s a record that might never be broken.

Miscellaneous

My Inspiration

2 Comments 28 May 2009

We’re all inspired by different things at different phases of our lives.

For me, right now, my family is probably the biggest inspiration that I have. God has blessed me with such an amazing friend for a wife, and my kids are such a pleasure to be with. When I think about it I literally start to question why it is that God has blessed me so much beyond what I deserve…and I’m not just saying that to sound like a good guy or something. I just don’t get it.

My family inspires me to take care of my body, so I’ll be there for them as long as I can be. They inspire me to put my 40 hours in at a job I am not super passionate about because I love being able to provide for them. They inspire me to work on the craft of writing and making people laugh, because they want me to do the things I feel like I’m supposed to be doing. And they inspire me to honor God with my life and the decisions I make, because I want to be a positive influence on all of them, helping them serve God in their own unique way.

To Erica, Kylie, and Parker: thanks for putting up with such a doofus for a dad. And thanks for being so incredible. I love you guys.

Whatever or whomever it is that inspires you, be sure to thank God today for bringing them into your life. Every good and perfect gift is from above.

Humor

Storyville Coffee

4 Comments 27 May 2009

What if I told you that every dollar you spent on coffee over the next month could go DIRECTLY to the International Justice Mission (who I highlighted on the blog yesterday)?

Well my friends (and enemies), as absurd as this is, you can make this happen.

Storyville Coffee is literally giving away every dollar they make in May (including shipping costs!) to the International Justice Mission to aid in the work of rescuing girls/children from human trafficking and prostitution rings.

In case you don’t get it, let me spell it out for you:

1. You order a bunch of coffee from Storyville in the next 3 days.

2. They take all the money you spend and give it to IJM.

3. Storyville gets great publicity, you drink great coffee (according to my friend Brad, it is great coffee) & IJM gets much needed funds.

4. You come back to my blog and tell me about it.

This is a WIN-WIN-WIN. And honestly, it almost makes it sinful to get coffee from anywhere else over the next 3 days. I kid, I kid.

This offer runs out late Sunday night, so go order some now. Even if you don’t like coffee…order some anyway and give it away as a gift. The only downside that I can see is that they send you beans, not ground coffee, so hopefully you have a coffee grinder.

PS…I don’t have a coffee grinder, can you anyone recommend an inexpensive, reliable one?

(h/t: IJM, BradRuggles.com, Storyville Coffee)



Bryan Allain is a writer, speaker, and pretend hitchhiker living in Lancaster County, PA with his wife Erica and their two kids, Kylie and Parker.
He'll make you laugh or your money back.
You can reach him at bryanallain(at)gmail.com

   


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