There Was Corn in Egypt

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Posted on Wed, May 28th, 2008 - 11:58 am by Bryan Allain

My friend Jason Boyett is running a contest on his blog, and I need your vote to win.

Among the many things that Jason does, he owns fakebandshirts.com, a site where you can order a t-shirt for a band that doesn’t exist. Brilliant, no? (Jason also dresses like a clown for elderly bachelor parties and gives juggling lessons to dyslexic farmhands.)

Jason recently accepted submissions for a new band name to adorn a t-shirt, with the only rules being that the name of the band had to come directly from text from the Bible.

Being that i love creating fake band and album names, I was all over it. I loaded up the Bible Gateway on my Interwebs browser and searched long and hard through obscure KJV texts in order to come up with a great band name. (man, i gotta tell you, that KJV sure does read funny. i’ll take a modern translation any day.)

Here were the names I submitted:

Nor Thine Ox
(Deut 5:14)

Captain of Fifty
(2 Kings 1:9)

Slaughter of the Kings
(Hebrews 7:1)

Zenas the lawyer
(Titus 3:13)

By Reason of the Fire
(Deut 5:5)

Of Pomegranates
(Numbers 20:5)

No King but Caesar
(John 19:15)

There was Corn in Egypt
(Acts 7:12)

My personal favorite was “Of Pomegranates”, but Jason chose “There Was Corn in Egypt” as one of the 6 Finalists. So, how can you help?

Go over to Jason’s blog and vote for There Was Corn in Egypt as your favorite fake band name.

If I win, I think i get a t-shirt with the band name on it or something.

(and while you’re at Jason’s site, you might want to consider buying his book “Pocket Guide to the Bible” for $6.99. That’s pretty cheap, especially considering he’ll autograph it for you…with his own blood! don’t worry, he has his blood in a pen, it’s not like he would cut off his finger and use the bleeding end of it to sign the book. that would be gross.)

Posted by Bryan Allain

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Bryan Allain is a writer, speaker, and pretend hitchhiker living in Lancaster County, PA with his wife Erica and their two kids, Kylie and Parker.
He'll make you laugh or your money back.
You can reach him at bryanallain(at)gmail.com

   


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